In-Laws, like every other relations can be overbearing and intrusive. It is important to remember that they are family and that they are just trying to help (most of the time!). Here are 7 ways in which you can avoid conflicts with your significant other’s family.
1. Learn to laugh it off
A lot of problems usually dissolve when one person just laughs it off. If your in-laws are doing something that you think is offensive, just look at the funny aspect of it and move forward from it. Dwelling in the same problem and constantly finding a way to retaliate is not only time consuming, but physically and mentally exhausting. No one needs that in their life, especially because of small conflicts with their in-laws. So take a deep breath and just laugh it off.
2. Be kind and grateful
It is said that it takes 8 positive encounters to negate 1 negative one. Being kind and grateful when necessary is always a nice thing to do. Appreciate everything that your in-laws do for you, as this creates a positive environment that encourages good behaviour from everyone and also lessens the amount of conflicts.
3. Know when to hold your tongue
People will say mean things and unnecessary criticize you all the time. A lot of the times, these people will be your in-laws. When this happens, it is important to know when and when not to respond to the comments and criticisms. Find a way to cool off and forget about the situation because chances are you can’t change them.
4. Communication is key
Communication is the main aspect of every relationship. If you aren’t communicating with your spouse, your in-laws or your parents, then you are basically letting all the problems build up on the relationship. This seems like a good idea until all of these piled up problems start to spill over. That is why it is good to communicate and express your problems in a nice way as and when they occur. This way, you can sort out all your issues and not carry all the problems with you constantly.
5. Have boundaries and limits
At the end of the day, when it comes to your family, you have all the rights to set the boundaries as to the involvement of your in-laws in your lives. Make sure you enforce these boundaries and talk out any problems your in-laws or spouse may have with these boundaries. It is important to negotiate and not be stubborn. Remember that your in-laws are your spouse’s family and that they just want what’s best for their child.
A lot of the time we belittle the advice and aid given by our in-laws because we think that they have an outdated thought process and that their ideas won’t work in the modern world. However, more often than not, their advice holds good and are very helpful. Even during times when the advice may be a little traditional and old-school, it doesn’t hurt to listen. By listening, you validate their opinion and make them feel handy.
7. Be mature
Learn to look from your in-laws point of view, as all they want to do is help their child out and still be an important part of their child’s life. Adjust to certain things that you feel are not very large issues and deal maturely when it comes to bigger problems. It may be difficult, but sometimes, we have to be the bigger person even though it isn’t our fault.
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