Even if you don’t have any immediate plans of becoming a mum, you probably have at least made a vague assumption of what motherhood will be like. The thing about a majority of these expectations, though, is that most of them are contrary to what actually goes down once you have a child in your life.
Here, some mums admit how they assumed things would be and how they actually turned out.
1. “I thought that breastfeeding would come naturally and be pleasing, like how perfect and effortless it’s made out to be and all of that. Instead, the baby’s head is flailing all over my breasts, and I’m struggling to make him drink the milk that I work so hard to provide.” — Shaban, 32, Hyderabad
2. “I expected biological maternal instincts to automatically kick in, and that I’d know precisely what to do and when and be the super mum I thought I’d be. In reality, I ponder with every single decision I make and wonder if I’m potentially messing up my kids.” — Krutika, 29, Mumbai
3. “Negotiating, I assumed, would be an issue once he grows up. I thought my toddler would just be more obedient now as a little child. But, the thing I realised was how often I would have to negotiate with my kid from such a young age for every little thing, whether it be sleeping or eating or getting him cleaned up. Every single thing has to be negotiated with the little brat.” — Dimple, 34, Delhi
4. “I believed all babies start sleeping through the night after the first couple of weeks. It’s been 2 years now, and it’s only now that my daughter has started to sleep through the night.” —Deepika, 31, Ahmedabad5. “I thought my son would learn to speak just from listening to us talk, but I realised that every child develops verbal skills at a different rate, and it takes
5. “I thought my son would learn to speak just from listening to us talk, but I realised that every child develops verbal skills at a different rate, and it takes them, even more, time if it’s a bilingual home because of the added confusion. ” — Asmita, 27, Pune
6. “I thought I’d easily get used to being a mum – waking up early, dressing the kids up, making breakfast, playtime and then somehow efficiently incorporating the cooking and cleaning into the day as well. I’m a mother of two kids now and have come to realise that this is not nearly as seamless as I’d thought it’d be.” — Padma, 36, Bangalore
7. “I understood that having a child would bring some drastic changes in our lives, but what I didn’t realise was how much it would change me. I’ve become more patient and easygoing since having my first child, which has intersected with my career and has been really effective overall.” — Aarthi, 33, Chennai
8. “I expected that I would fall madly in love with being a mother the moment I gave birth because that’s what I’d seen in the movies. What they never showed was how anxiety and postpartum depression make new mums feel. At times, I even feel guilty and alone and think that I made a big mistake getting into motherhood.” — Debasmita, 32, Kolkata
9. “I figured I’d have my pre-pregnancy body back in at least six to eight weeks post-pregnancy. It took me 15 months to get back into shape.” — Chetna, 33, Jaipur
10. “I thought all babies behave and act the same, and that they don’t start showing any noticeable difference until they turn a few years old. Now I can see my 3-year-old son’s calm personality was his way since he was a newborn, as he’d be pretty patient and won’t cry all the time to get what he wanted.” — Pournima, 33, Nasik